Note: In the Ask Patrenia articles, I answer questions from readers sent to me by Email, Twitter or Facebook. Feel free to ask your money questions. I look forward to it. 
It hits everyone of us at some point and time in our life. The four letter word…FEAR!
I received a question here on the site a while back from a reader that I have grown to respect and admire not only for her inspiration, but her courage to motivate others. Here’s what she said…
I’d love to read more about getting over your fear of money… that’s a personal issue for me. Like I know that tools exist to help me get on track… but just admitting how bad things are in order to get on that track is scary! I know I have to “feel the fear and do it anyway”…. but I swear that financial stuff seems the hardest area to improve sometimes. – Anilia, MotivatedSista
Firstly, I want to thank Anilia for this question and her bravery for stating that fear of money is a personal issue. It is an issue for most of us, but we don’t want anyone to know that we are a little afraid of facing the money issues. Truth is, just about every day, we have to resist the fear of “something”. It may not be money, but it’s all just the same. So, if you’re wrestling with fear, try one or more of these ideas.
Take Small Steps. Whenever we attempt to learn a new process, we tend to suffer from fear of the unknown. We’re excited about a new endeavor. We find lots of information about the subject. Our information is from different sources, different people with different views. So not only do we have too much information, but the information suggests different ideas. What are our next actions? Nothing. The stress level has risen, we’re confused and it’s just seems easier to do nothing. So just take it slow, learn and start practicing the new process.
Don’t Be Afraid To Make Mistakes. Denis Waitley once said that failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. I wholeheartedly agree, making mistakes is part of the learning process. When a baby learns to walk, how many times do they fall? When you learned how to ride a bike, how many times did you fall?
See Every Day As A New Start. Use yesterday as a reference, but don’t let the actions linger. If any unintentional events occurred, don’t dwell on them. Figure out what went wrong and make corrections to avoid the same problem in the future.
Consider Your Prior Victories. Make a list of other goals you were able to achieve. Not necessarily financial goals, just life goals in general. When doubt or fear enter into you mind, pull out your victory list and gain strength.
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Taking control of your money is not as intimidating as it seems. It’s just a few daily disciplines practiced everyday. We all know what they say about practice – practice makes perfect. Ok, I’m not so sure about the “perfect” part, but it will be at least better.
So, stop thinking or be held back by fear and take some action!
Feel free to add your own tips. How do you overcome fear?
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Freedom Not Fear Image by James Cronin
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Thank you sooo much for writing this article. I wanted to digest your advice and put it into action first before I commented on your response to my question.
So the first thing I did, was tell myself that regardless of how big of a hole I might be in, it didn’t develop overnight so its not realistic to think that I can fill that hole overnight. Then I made myself call the student loan/creditors that scare me the most! Talk about nerve-wracking!! But the funny thing was, once I started talking to each representative, it wasn’t bad at all. And I still felt that I was in control of the situation, and not like someone was wagging their finger at me at my debts.
I definitely took small steps – I revised the budget that I created a while ago with the current bills and salary that I have. And I also patted myself on the back for getting on the phone with folks and changing my budget. You know I’m all about mindset, so I also read some articles on different ways to think about money. I think I like this one best – http://www.inlightimes.com/archives/2005/12/financial-alchemy.htm
Thanks again Patrenia – I really appreciate you taking the time to answer my question. When I’ve progressed to the point where I’m driving my shiny new car, I’ll send you a pic to post on PFN
Yes! Yes! Yes!!! I am so excited for you. Taking small steps starts the process. You may not be able to see the entire staircase, but each step will be revealed throughout this process.
I loved this article you recommended. I’ve printed it and will be using it for future reference. It reminds me so much of the premise surrounding “The Secret”. I love that kind of stuff.
You are very welcome! And this is only the beginning! I’ll be waiting for the picture!
p.s. I hope I’m understanding your statement correctly, but have you considered consolidating the student loans?